Living an Intentional Life is something I think we all want to do. Living an Intentional Life means being very deliberate in identifying what it is you want for your life in a variety of areas (health, career, relationships, etc.) and then really making those goals happen.
I think most adults want to live in a way where they feel in control of their future and enjoying their present existence. We get frustrated and upset when we feel dis-empowered or behind in achieving our dreams. When we break a commitment to our self, we lower our self-esteem.
Over time, not following through with our intentions can become a bad habit that perpetuates itself. This bad habit then sets you up for more failure, keeping one’s self-esteem low and creating a whole cycle of not following through and not feeling good about how one is living their life. Not keeping one’s commitments is a learned behavior. Without awareness and successful behavior change, failure becomes a pattern and gets repeated throughout life.
So if you have created a pattern of breaking commitments to yourself, how can you change?
1). Take baby steps. Once you have identified your intention, take the smallest of steps towards achieving that intention. For instance if my intention was to make 5 dinners per week, and I started with planning for, shopping, and preparing just one meal for this upcoming week, then I have taken the first step. I can feel good about this step because it can give me the momentum to continue with it for the following week and to then add in a second dinner.
2). Hold yourself accountable. Accountability is key in sustaining a behavior change. Hire a life coach ;-), enlist a good friend, create an accountability group with co-workers…. When you have another person who is in your corner rooting for you to be successful and whom is willing to regularly check on you and ask about the changes you’re making and examines with you when you get stuck and why…. well, you increase your chances of seeing through your intention dramatically! It is much, much harder to blow off someone else than it is yourself. When you know you are answering to someone else, who cares about you and wants you to succeed, it is powerful in supporting change.
3). Eliminate unattainable action items on your To-Do List. Cross things off of your list that are simply not getting done. Identify things that only feel like a ‘Hell Yes!’ If they aren’t feeling like that, then you will not be inspired to complete them… and they will continue to sit on your list which does not feel good. For instance, going back to my example of making 5 dinners weekly… if I put on my list that I will make everything from scratch (to include pasta and fries), then I will never complete my intentions. There is no way in heck I’m going to learn to make homemade pasta and actually do it, nor am I going to take the time to cut my own french fries. I know that cooking is not inspiring to me, so I will need to modify my list of what is acceptable to completing the 5 dinners (i.e. Using boxed pasta and frozen fries).
The Inspiration thing is huge in living an Intentional Life. More on that in an upcoming blog!! ;-)
